I'm writing a series of case studies on our clients' experience with
our software solution. I'm trying to keep them brief -- easier for
media to print, easy for me to throw in a press or sales kit, etc. My
boss told me last night that he thinks they're weak and too short (he's
the prez and a sales guy, not a PR guy). He says there's no "oomph!"
but I just can't figure out how to charge them up without making them
too salesy.

Add to that that our clients are mostly sole proprietors with a small
staff if any at all (read: VERY busy people wearing many hats) so they
didn't give me a ton of information so part of it is also making due
with what I have or trying to fill in the gaps with research.

Feeling totally incompetent today -- any advice would be much
appreciated.

Thank you,
Lisa